CRUSHING OF POLITICAL DISSENT: The ongoing and extremely controversial assault on the civil liberties of punctuation marks by British police and the Security Service, MI-5, continued today despite the Labor Government's denial that any such crackdown is underway. Twelve question marks and a comma were arrested on unspecified charges in London today, while in Liverpool an asterisk and a parentheses were taken into custody, questioned, and then released. Punctuation marks have been the subject of government harassment recently due to their belief that the European Union is full of foreigners seeking to take the jobs of English punctuation marks. Today the exclamation and the semicolon both announced that they would emigrate to the United States or Australia to get away from one exclamation point described anonymously as "an increasing dangerous situation here in Britain." Other punctuation marks have not gone on record as to what they would do in the hostile atmosphere in Britain, but a spokesman for the apostrophe community announced the creation of the Apostrophe Protection Society as a way of preventing violence towards apostrophes and to protect the civil liberties of apostrophes throughout Britain.