tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-55309482012-01-22T12:43:46.228-08:00The Passing Parade: Cheap Shots from a Drive By Mind"...for the Snark was a Boojum, you see..."
Just what the hell does that mean, anyway?
akakyakakyevich@gmail.comAkakyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00187471562516416268noreply@blogger.comBlogger8611100tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5530948.post-50298758936274544652012-01-22T12:25:00.000-08:002012-01-22T12:43:46.286-08:00WHY AKAKY IS POSTING TO THIS BLOG NOW: Well, and I'm not at this point, but I am feeling much better than I was, although that really isn't saying much; short of driving a red-hot fork into my left eye and twisting it around three times almost anything would have been an improvement. But I am improved so I shouldn't complain. The medications appears to be working, even if they are all doing a Akakyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00187471562516416268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5530948.post-79099763175424178012012-01-07T12:11:00.000-08:002012-01-07T12:14:55.271-08:00WHY AKAKY HASN'T BEEN POSTING ON THIS BLOG: Rheumatoid arthritis, a disease whose suckiness has to be experienced first hand in order to be truly appreciated. When I manage to climb out of the cave of woes, folks, I will try to think of something for this place. Until then, you are on your own. You will not, however, have to spend any more time thinking about what the people of Iowa think about Akakyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00187471562516416268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5530948.post-89511450020930485092011-11-20T14:28:00.000-08:002011-12-06T11:32:07.930-08:00OWS IT GOING, AND IT SHOULD GO FASTER: I suppose it had to happen sooner or later, and like all such phenomena bound to happen sooner or later—things like root canal with inadequate anesthesia, an IRS audit with an incompetent accountant, or having a pack of starved hyenas devour your intestines while you watch come immediately to mind—most of us here were hoping that this would happen much, muchAkakyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00187471562516416268noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5530948.post-26844938141043101822011-11-15T16:32:00.000-08:002011-11-15T16:34:22.060-08:00WHAT TO DO TILL THE COWS COME HOME, OR OUR BOVINES HAVE TENDER GRAPES: I don’t know about you, but I wonder sometimes where the cows have gone to when someone tells me that I can wait till the cows come home. I never thought of cows as being a particularly adventuresome lot; they strike me as being a sort of homebodyish species, if homebodyish even counts as a word, and not at all given to the Akakyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00187471562516416268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5530948.post-90474846088277491112011-10-22T10:24:00.000-07:002011-10-22T16:17:14.587-07:00UNCLE PADDY AND THE CRAPPING HAT, AND OTHER ADVENTURES IN THE UNKNOWN: As is well-known, which was something Soviet diplomats used to say just before they said something previously unknown to anyone not paying attention to what Moscow wanted that week, my Uncle Paddy wore a hat whenever he had to move his bowels. It was one of those Irish floppy bucket hats, the kind that the late Senator DanielAkakyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00187471562516416268noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5530948.post-31328710526310440262011-10-13T13:25:00.000-07:002011-10-13T13:26:19.089-07:00DEATH AND SCHOOL TAXES: Well, it's time to pay the school taxes again and once again I find myself wondering just what in the hell my money's going for. I don't suppose I'd object to paying the taxes if they uneducable dolts who infest the school buildings my money provides them actually learned something, but as we all know, the modern American school is simply a place to warehouse the young Akakyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00187471562516416268noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5530948.post-9898543314128945052011-09-26T11:18:00.000-07:002011-09-26T11:20:30.482-07:0050,000 BIG ONES: You may find this a little hard to believe, but sometime in the next week or so The Passing Parade will log in its 50,000 visitor. Now I know that might not seem like a lot to you; there are sites out there that log in that many people in a few minutes and manage to do so without showing pictures of naked women, if you can wrap your mind around such a possibility. But The PassingAkakyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00187471562516416268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5530948.post-85271593867465099452011-09-08T07:47:00.000-07:002011-09-09T12:50:37.630-07:00FLEABAGS AND OTHER TALES OF MORAL OPPROBRIUM: Please allow me to preface my remarks here by saying that yes, despite what many people here in our happy little burg will tell you, I really do like dogs. I am fond of dogs in much the same way that I am fond of children. In fact, I actually know people who have both dogs and children and I know them to be among the finest people I have ever met. If Akakyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00187471562516416268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5530948.post-23248686668849207002011-09-02T07:54:00.000-07:002011-09-02T07:56:39.782-07:00DR. STRANGETUBER, OR HOW I LEARNED TO STOP WORRYING AND LOVE THE POTATO: I am not sure when the boys down the street at the Eldon T. Johnson Volunteer Hook & Ladder Volunteer Fire Company decided to join the military-industrial complex, but I suppose that anything that appeals to their innate patriotism, sense of civic duty, and gives them something to do with their time besides drinking beer andAkakyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00187471562516416268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5530948.post-56747063785933890512011-08-26T10:53:00.001-07:002011-08-28T13:02:00.566-07:00ANNOUNCEMENT:
Yes, I am working on something for here; I am not on vacation, although I’m sure it appears that way to everyone. I trust that everyone will understand that with Miss Irene bearing down on us here in our happy little burg the piece I am alluding to will not be posted until sometime next week, when, I presume, the local utility will have cleared away all the fallen trees and restoredAkakyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00187471562516416268noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5530948.post-64504587682900832022011-08-09T16:42:00.000-07:002011-08-09T16:43:56.600-07:00 Self-Portrait for Burn Magazine.
Akakyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00187471562516416268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5530948.post-34174431449763981442011-07-29T12:44:00.000-07:002011-07-29T12:45:19.392-07:00COLLECTIVE NOUNS: You may not have noticed this, but the English collective noun is a wonderful, often beautiful thing. For example, Anglophone crows travel in murders, whereas larks travel in exaltations, while below them float rabbles of butterflies flitting over clowders of cats as they hunt mews of capons, said capons no doubt mewing over their lost gonads, for which collective, I am sorry Akakyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00187471562516416268noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5530948.post-63318495427764316732011-07-14T13:29:00.000-07:002011-07-28T15:28:32.493-07:00A BIT OF EVERYTHING HERE: We are having scattered showers and thunderstorms here in our happy little burg today, which makes me wonder whether or not the lexicographical skills of the meteorological staff at radio station WTF [CLASSIC ROCK N’ROLL FOR THE VALLEY AND OUR HAPPY LITTLE BURG, ALL DAY ALL NIGHT ROCK WITH WTF!!!] are entirely up to snuff. As I understand the concept, scattered showers Akakyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00187471562516416268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5530948.post-44928911928555547262011-07-04T10:45:00.000-07:002011-07-04T10:47:54.626-07:00WHAT THE DAY IS ALL ABOUT, FOLKS:(Adopted by Congress on July 4, 1776) The Unanimous Declaration of the Thirteen United States of America When, in the course of human events, it becomes necessary for one people to dissolve the political bands which have connected them with another, and to assume among the powers of the earth, the separate and equal station to which the laws of nature and of Akakyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00187471562516416268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5530948.post-20920330585680664562011-06-19T10:11:00.000-07:002011-06-19T10:13:05.460-07:00ETIQUETTE AND THE WORLD OF MICROBES: I have cellulitis. I’m sorry, but as look at that first sentence I realize that I shouldn’t sound so sure of myself. I think I have cellulitis; that’s actually much closer to the truth. But whatever the actual truth of the matter is, I have some form of –itis and it doesn’t want to go away. If you’ve never heard of cellulitis then do not fear; from what I Akakyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00187471562516416268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5530948.post-55632729100414621892011-06-10T07:37:00.000-07:002011-06-10T07:39:26.086-07:00MILL STREET AND THE LETTER OF THE LAW: I am a great believer in the black letter approach to law. I think the law is what it says it is and that judges must base their interpretations of the law on what is actually in the law and not what they want to see in the law. I believe that the Constitution gives Congress certain enumerated powers and that if Congress want to make the case for an Akakyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00187471562516416268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5530948.post-20905019556878602062011-06-03T16:14:00.001-07:002011-06-03T16:21:39.739-07:00Again, my apologies for the blogging drought, but the vacation came with assorted pulled muscles in my legs and in my groin [OUCH, DAMMIT!!!] and has finished off with prolonged pain in my knees and feet. As I've mentioned before, I find it next to impossible to write when I am only slightly uncomfortable; how much more impossible, if there are in fact degrees of impossibility--you would think Akakyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00187471562516416268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5530948.post-26707363395337749312011-05-20T14:40:00.000-07:002011-05-20T14:41:59.701-07:00JUST DROPPING IN FOR A MOMENT, FOLKS: I’ve been on vacation the past couple of weeks, during which time I’ve managed to pull muscles in my groin and in my upper thigh, events I will have more to say about at another time, and as a result of my vacationing I’ve managed to miss more than a few things in the news. One thing that did get through, though, was the latest on the former junior senator Akakyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00187471562516416268noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5530948.post-13046854298219224642011-04-20T07:24:00.000-07:002011-04-20T07:31:01.913-07:00AND FLIGHTS OF ANGELS SING THEE TO THY REST, UNLESS YOU'RE FLYING COACH: Death comes for all men, something I really don’t want to believe because I keep hoping that I might somehow wangle an exception to the rule, but in order to cater to this unhappy need there are two funeral homes here in our happy little burg, the P. J. Hanrahan Funeral Home and P.J Hanrahan & Sons Funeral Home, and no, the Akakyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00187471562516416268noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5530948.post-28831278616334311302011-03-12T12:41:00.000-08:002011-03-12T12:43:15.338-08:00MARCHING THROUGH OUR HAPPY LITTLE BURG: Well, it’s the Saturday before St. Patrick’s Day and here in our happy little burg that can mean only one thing—actually, it could mean more than one thing, I suppose, but I would prefer not to confuse the issue here—it’s time yet again for the annual St. Patrick’s Day Charity Chug—a—Lug and Drunken Brawl. Yes, every year thousands of already drunken Akakyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00187471562516416268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5530948.post-85777876403559307792011-02-14T16:14:00.000-08:002011-02-14T16:17:07.435-08:00AND WHY THE SEA IS BOILING HOT AND WHETHER PIGS HAVE WINGS: If you walk down the main thoroughfare of our happy little burg, said thoroughfare being Main Street, a name that combines accuracy, pithiness, and an extraordinary lack of imagination in just two words, you will pass a great deal of mediocre 19th century architecture; many a mediocre 19th century architect first practiced his craft hereAkakyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00187471562516416268noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5530948.post-48346066854768174292011-01-27T13:37:00.000-08:002011-01-27T13:38:58.526-08:00STATE OF THE UNION: I didn’t watch the State of the Union speech, although I suppose I should have—it’s part of my civic obligation as an American citizen, after all, just like jury duty or betting on the Lotto and so doing my part to educate the uneducable little wretches that daily infest school buildings from one end of this our Great Republic to the other—but if I want to watch someone spout Akakyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00187471562516416268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5530948.post-49241253798216846952011-01-08T08:42:00.000-08:002011-01-20T11:05:28.719-08:00LESTER YOUNG AND THE MUSICAL METAPHYSICS OF BURGLARY: I find that as I get older that there are a great number of things that I don’t understand, which I understand is a consequence of getting older in the first place, and that no one will explain these things I don’t understand to me, which I understand is just plain rude. There are, for example, any number of good reasons why a burglar might Akakyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00187471562516416268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5530948.post-7392585733282908192011-01-04T16:13:00.000-08:002011-01-04T16:20:40.094-08:00A CHRONOLOGICAL CONUNDRUM: So here’s the thing: Auckland, New Zealand is, as far as I know, the first large city to celebrate the New Year, and Honolulu, Hawaii is the last. The two cities lie some 4,392 miles apart [that’s 7,072 kilometers for those of you of the metric persuasion] and in between them lies the International Date Line, a distance easily traversed today in the era of jet travel. Akakyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00187471562516416268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5530948.post-12054501168851920112010-12-31T09:01:00.000-08:002010-12-31T09:03:21.275-08:00HAPPY NEW YEAR TO ALL!!! The first resolution of the new year is to write more stuff for The Passing Parade, and the second resolution of the year is to break any resolution I might make for the new year. This way I know I'll always keep at least one resolution. Enjoy the rest of your day!Akakyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00187471562516416268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5530948.post-27041373140943195642010-12-22T07:53:00.000-08:002010-12-22T07:55:50.336-08:00BLESS GAIA: “Tonight is the longest night of the year,” said the Green Woman, “and it is on this night that we must awaken our spiritual energy and send it forth and bring back the light of the sun to the Earth, because the Earth is in great need…” And so it went, just before the winter solstice yesterday, as a man made a fire with a bow and a stick, and a woman dressed like an extra in a road Akakyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00187471562516416268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5530948.post-32227560370151370622010-12-09T12:21:00.000-08:002010-12-09T12:23:36.790-08:00THE RAGE OF THE LEFTIES: The hard left is not happy with the former junior senator from Illinois, and I suspect the former junior senator from Illinois is not happy with himself, but I suspect that both of them will get over it by 2012. Not so, say some of the left, we will primary the turncoat for his departure from the purest of pure dogma; I suspect if they could burn him at the stake for hisAkakyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00187471562516416268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5530948.post-11066964138031153162010-11-27T15:34:00.000-08:002010-11-27T15:37:16.595-08:00BLOODSUCKERS AND OTHER DEMOCRATS: Bedbugs are all the rage in New York these days, in the same way that radical chic and mau-mauing the flak catchers used to be. There’s scarcely a day goes by any more without some new report of bedbugs showing up in the local media and sometimes in their beds as well. And now I hear that there’s even bedbugs in the Waldorf-Astoria, and you now that when the Akakyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00187471562516416268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5530948.post-87871807414897636152010-11-20T12:45:00.000-08:002010-11-20T12:48:09.152-08:00OLD GLORY AND THE DISCONTENTED: Now let me see if I’ve got this straight: in the state of California, a state that is slowly (and then suddenly, like Mike in The Sun Also Rises) going bankrupt, school officials have nothing better to do with their time than to tell a kid that he can’t fly an American flag on his bicycle because such flagwaving, an old and endearing American habit, by the way, Akakyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00187471562516416268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5530948.post-67816113473811497582010-11-20T08:57:00.000-08:002010-11-20T08:58:21.287-08:00POLITICS AS UNUSUAL: Elections have consequences, a point the former junior Senator from Illinois probably wishes he hadn’t raised back in the halcyon days of 2009, when all the world was fresh and young and filled with infinite possibilities, since there are now all too many Republicans who are more than willing to point out that very same fact to him. Being hoist by one’s own petard is never a Akakyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00187471562516416268noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5530948.post-23886440840209647672010-11-13T12:21:00.000-08:002010-11-13T12:24:30.169-08:00NO, I DON'T KNOW WHAT THIS MEANS: There’s been a good deal of talk these past few years about the genetic modification of various foodstuffs, especially those foodstuffs derived from plants. I suppose I should be worried about this; millions of other people are worried about genetic modification and who am I not to be worried when so many others are; but frankly, I’m not. No matter how much youAkakyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00187471562516416268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5530948.post-86387904551489395792010-11-11T14:36:00.000-08:002010-11-11T14:49:33.537-08:00"In Flanders Fields the poppies blow Between the crosses row on row, That mark our place; and in the sky The larks, still bravely singing, fly Scarce heard amid the guns below. We are the Dead. Short days ago We lived, felt dawn, saw sunset glow, Loved and were loved, and now we lie In Flanders fields. Take up our quarrel with the foe: To you from failing hands we throw The torch; be yours to Akakyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00187471562516416268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5530948.post-53688633499664335262010-10-28T09:00:00.000-07:002010-10-28T09:06:57.778-07:00PUNCTUATION AND ITS DISCONTENTS: National Punctuation Day was September 24th this year and it pains me to admit that I missed the great day completely. This was entirely my own fault; I simply wasn’t paying enough attention and the day went by with nary a hosanna in praise of the period or a paean to the delights of the semicolon from me. To all, I wish to apologize deeply for this Akakyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00187471562516416268noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5530948.post-71163741669282947722010-10-04T10:48:00.000-07:002010-10-04T10:51:52.990-07:00BEARDING, A LESSON IN NO PARTS: To begin, we must first point out that the existence of the beard is, before it is anything else, a philosophical question, at least in the West, whereas in other cultures the beard is not merely simply a matter of philosophy, but one of theology. Orthodox Jews, for example, refrain from shaving, obeying Leviticus’ command that the Children of Israel, or at least Akakyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00187471562516416268noreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5530948.post-25125778731389936642010-10-02T09:55:00.000-07:002010-10-02T10:07:25.967-07:00MY APOLOGIES, OR MORE EXCUSES, A CONTINUING MELODRAMA: Okay, folks, I realize that I gave an absolute guarantee that there would be a new piece here by last Monday. The fact that you are reading yet another mea culpa for it not being here is not through any lack of willingness on my part, but rather said lack is the unfortunate byproduct of the large scale viral invasion of my upper respiratory Akakyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00187471562516416268noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5530948.post-58738029036719101632010-09-25T10:22:00.000-07:002010-09-25T10:49:13.746-07:00ALERT! : Okay, folks, there will be a new piece here either Monday or Tuesday; I've written it and it'd be on today, but I am working now and I don't think the powers that be would approve of my using office time to work on my personal blog. So hang on just a little bit longer. In the meantime, go over to Akaky's Amateur Photos Inc. and enjoy some of the new pictures I just put up there.Akakyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00187471562516416268noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5530948.post-13999595657776670822010-09-09T12:57:00.000-07:002010-09-09T13:09:08.110-07:00 Brazilian Independence Day has come and gone, and no, I do not have anything new to post, although I am working on something. In the meantime, there is the young lady to the left, who is much more pleasing to the eye than anything I could write hereAkakyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00187471562516416268noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5530948.post-8276994186474283692010-08-19T07:22:00.000-07:002010-08-19T12:14:27.394-07:00O CANADA, GET LOST: There’s been a great deal of debate about Arizona’s illegal immigration law in particular and illegal immigrants in general these past few months, and yet I haven’t seen much comment about the Vampire State’s plans for one group of unwanted immigrants, which, I must admit, surprises me no end. I thought the idea would raise a ruckus with the same breathless alacrity that the Akakyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00187471562516416268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5530948.post-4943404915658864082010-08-10T07:03:00.000-07:002010-08-10T07:04:34.906-07:00EXCUSES, EXCUSES: My apologies for the prolonged absence, folks, but I have been writing something for the first print edition of an online magazine and trying to think of captions, and so my mind has been elsewhere the past few weeks. I do not write great captions, unfortunately, and as these captions are going into a book of photos about the Green Line in Cyprus, they can’t be the usual Akakyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00187471562516416268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5530948.post-25926768695138581952010-07-13T11:22:00.000-07:002010-07-13T11:23:34.129-07:00JUST A THOUGHT: There’s no long piece attached, just an observation here. I ate my lunch about half an hour ago down the street in my favorite deli, a nice place that offers quality sandwiches, air conditioning, and, even more important, distance from the egregious mold pit wherein I labor for my daily bread, enough distance so that the importuning masses who plague my existence during working Akakyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00187471562516416268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5530948.post-12866705372977962982010-06-27T15:54:00.000-07:002011-04-15T13:09:27.327-07:00A MODERN FAIRY TALE: [Commercial break fades; dramatic TV news music, the kind of noise that’s supposed to make the usual gruel of crime, traffic accidents, sports, weather, and celebrity gossip sound much more important than they really are, swells up, and the main camera swoops in on the anchor desk. There are two anchors, of course, a middle-aged white male with more than a little gray in his Akakyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00187471562516416268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5530948.post-13986034340691079502010-06-21T11:32:00.000-07:002010-06-21T11:51:26.310-07:00STRIKE A POSE: Well, everything old is new again, something I know is so because it’s the title of a catchy tune, and if you can’t trust the veracity of Tin Pan Alley then what’s the point of life, that’s what I want to know, but I think that the recent upsurge in the popularity of voguing in the nation’s capitol is a bit much, if you know what I mean. Ever since Al Gore did his version of the Akakyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00187471562516416268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5530948.post-16071436152359750162010-06-03T07:37:00.000-07:002010-06-03T16:19:15.414-07:00VACATIONS, OR HOW NOT TO ENJOY YOURSELF IN ONE EASY LESSON: Here’s the thing: I don’t do vacation well. This is a terrible thing to have to admit about yourself, and I realize that most people might find this particular form of anhedonia a bit mystifying. To the vast majority of people, vacation, especially paid vacation, is something one cherishes, plans for, and enjoys for every second it’s Akakyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00187471562516416268noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5530948.post-31365964345670204942010-06-02T16:10:00.000-07:002010-06-02T16:19:27.643-07:00AN INDECISIVE PHOTOGRAPHER'S SECOND SOLILOQUY: DO I USE FLASH OR NOT, COMPLETE WITH AT LEAST ONE SIGNIFICANT SPELLING ERROR?To flush, or not to flash–that is the question:Whether ’tis nobler in the mind to sufferThe slings and arrows of outrageous flatulenceOr to take Rolaids against a sea of troublesAnd by opposing end them. To flush, to flash–No more–and by a flush to say we endThe bellyache, Akakyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00187471562516416268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5530948.post-27029142151890974652010-05-25T08:07:00.000-07:002010-06-04T07:15:01.714-07:00POOR UNCLE MAX, RIP: Oh my God, that’s terrible news! Oh, I’m so sorry to hear of your troubles, Akaky, your Uncle Max, he was a good man, may he rest in peace. His troubles are over, poor man, and he’s in a better place. He didn’t suffer, I hope. Ah well, lad, it happens to us all, sooner or later. His time had come, that’s all, and [I really love this bit] things could have been much worseAkakyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00187471562516416268noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5530948.post-14095802681080592042010-04-09T08:45:00.000-07:002010-04-09T08:49:40.566-07:00TO THE LONG SUFFERING READERS OF THE PASSING PARADE: I am sorry, but I fear you must suffer a while longer. The egregious mold pit wherein I labor every day for a pittance has decided that a touch of renovation is in order; some paint, some new carpeting, and a few other things to render the egregiosity of this place, assuming egregiosity is even a word, a little less egregious. I have Akakyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00187471562516416268noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5530948.post-77527122309705618852010-03-26T12:59:00.000-07:002010-03-29T13:32:44.691-07:00MARCH ON WASHINGTON: And so there they were, the Congressional Black Caucus, marching bravely through the mobs of racist tea partiers screaming racial epithets and spitting upon the tribunes of the people as they went up the stairs into the Capitol to do the nation’s business. Having reached the safety of a friendly press conference, the members of the Caucus complained mightily of their Akakyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00187471562516416268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5530948.post-56894302856076156742010-03-23T09:21:00.000-07:002010-03-23T09:23:36.726-07:00STUPAK IS KAPUTS: And so last night I was flipping through the channels, as I am wont to do, and for once I actually stopped at MSNBC’s Rachel Maddow Show, making me one of twelve people watching the show last night. I don’t do this very often; now that I think on it, I almost never watch MSNBC, but I only have basic cable and the music choice channels weren’t playing anyone I like. And so there Akakyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00187471562516416268noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5530948.post-52834412773150192122010-03-18T15:45:00.000-07:002010-03-18T16:13:58.461-07:00It is the day after St. Patrick's Day, and all through the house, not a creature was stirring, shaking, or otherwise mixing drinks of any kind, for all the little drunks are now too hung over for words to describe. This is a good thing, I think, primarily because young persons do not learn anything unless the anything involved hits them very hard on their incredibly obtuse skulls. This is a Akakyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00187471562516416268noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5530948.post-29937819423096897632010-03-05T07:15:00.000-08:002010-03-05T07:32:37.554-08:00DON'T KNOW MUCH ABOUT THE FRENCH I TOOK: I don’t know a lot about a lot of things. The finer points of Christian theology are a mystery to me, as are higher mathematics, medium mathematics, and most lower mathematics as well. When I was a boy I could bisect an angle with the greatest of ease; this was my one and only mathematical accomplishment throughout elementary and secondary school and I wasAkakyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00187471562516416268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5530948.post-87647366608742142972010-02-11T12:10:00.000-08:002010-02-24T15:53:24.140-08:00My apologies, but I remain firmly in the grasp of an unbelievably bad dry spell, a dry spell made worse by the occasional good idea that pops up like a desert mirage, only to vanish the closer I get to turning the idea into actual words. Most of the usual remedies for dry spells—automatic writing, shoveling vast amounts of wet, heavy snow, and drinking large amounts of Diet Dr. Pepper with a sideAkakyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00187471562516416268noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5530948.post-82271057569224747902010-01-21T14:47:00.000-08:002010-01-21T15:19:36.007-08:00JUST A THOUGHT HERE: Dick Morris said something last night on television that struck me and I thought I'd just make a comment on it. Commenting on The O'Reilly Factor, Morris said that House Speaker Nancy Pelosi might still have the votes to pass the Obama health care bill. When O'Reilly pointed out that Pelosi only got the House version of the bill through with three votes to spare, Morris saidAkakyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00187471562516416268noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5530948.post-85385282363049642812010-01-16T12:39:00.000-08:002010-01-16T12:49:06.109-08:00ON WRITING WELL: For those of you interested in writing English well, there is no better advice that this from William Zinsser, the author of On Writing Well. It's a shame I don't actually practice what Mr. Zinsser so eloquently preaches, but at this late date I am a mass of bad habits that are almost impossible to get rid of. But there is hope for you.Akakyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00187471562516416268noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5530948.post-51289752248233345132010-01-07T08:10:00.000-08:002010-01-14T14:23:52.613-08:00XMAS GIFTS: If you’re a kid, this is the most wonderful time of the year (or it was when I started this piece). First, there’s the anticipation of Christmas Eve and then the joy of Christmas itself, followed by a week off where you get to play with all of your new stuff. It’s a wonderful time for adults as well. The Christmas shopping season is over until Labor Day (or is it the Fourth of July? Akakyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00187471562516416268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5530948.post-10467579889709937672009-12-24T12:39:00.000-08:002009-12-24T12:58:48.511-08:00AT RANDOM: Representative Parker Griffith, a Democrat of Alabama, is shedding his allegiance to the party of Jefferson and Jackson both forthwith and posthaste, a consequence, he says, of the Democratic Party’s unconscionable support for the health care bill currently before the Congress. It is interesting to note that even though there are almost twelve months between now and the next election, Akakyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00187471562516416268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5530948.post-68010236877697325362009-12-23T07:41:00.000-08:002010-01-14T13:38:23.060-08:00FAMILY PIX: Family photographs are wonderful things, or so people keep telling me, but I have very little use for them. I will admit to a certain amount of prejudice in the matter, as family photographs of the Clan Bashmachkin invariably include members of the eponymous clan (and I know this for a fact, too; I’ve seen some of those photographs and there are family members in each and everyone of Akakyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00187471562516416268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5530948.post-54300880533252685942009-12-04T07:55:00.000-08:002009-12-04T08:02:37.009-08:00WHY YOU SHOULD WRITE THINGS DOWN: Louis XIV, who was a well-known French person for those of you interested in well-known French persons, did not like water. He didn’t even like branch water, a peculiar aversion in a man whose family name was Bourbon, and because of his aversion to all things aquatic he refused to take more than one bath a year. The royal bath was, like the soul of wit, short Akakyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00187471562516416268noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5530948.post-87405289099093526522009-11-20T07:13:00.000-08:002010-03-03T13:02:35.281-08:00RULES FOR RADICALS, OR HOW NOT TO MAKE A KNISH: In Hemingway’s short story, ‘God rest you merry gentlemen,’ two Kansas City emergency room doctors make fun of a colleague named Wilcox as they wait for an emergency to happen on Christmas Day. Doctor Wilcox, as Hemingway makes clear, is not the best doctor in either Kansas City (there are two of them, for those of you new to American geography, a Akakyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00187471562516416268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5530948.post-92156094964957595612009-11-08T10:57:00.000-08:002009-11-08T11:01:00.083-08:00PELOSI TO COUNTRY: DROP DEAD!: The above is a headline you are not likely to see in the New York Daily News today, however much it reflects last night’s events. Still, it is always nice to know what the minions of Queen Nancy really think of the people they allegedly represent.Akakyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00187471562516416268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5530948.post-66699612187699828842009-11-01T14:17:00.000-08:002009-11-07T08:15:40.286-08:00AT RANDOM: Hi there. No, I don’t have anything new to say and it’s not even the usual writer’s block; it’s just me being lazy again. It is hard to be satirical, you see, when the times are satirical. The former junior Senator from Illinois is blaming all of his woes on the mess his predecessor left, as if Mr. Bush had just decided to leave the Oval Office and go golfing, leaving all of his work Akakyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00187471562516416268noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5530948.post-28546539062614039692009-10-09T07:34:00.000-07:002009-10-12T08:22:30.771-07:00NOBELMEN AND THE REVOLTING MASSES: News has arrived here from Norway that the former junior Senator from Illinois has, for reasons I am sure sounded better in Norwegian than they would in English, won the Nobel Peace Prize, thereby causing one of the many attacks of cognitive dissonance I seem to be suffering from these days. As I understand the traditional purpose of this award, one needs to Akakyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00187471562516416268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5530948.post-47585296633545296982009-10-08T07:01:00.000-07:002009-10-08T07:03:58.792-07:00WAFFLING ALONG: GeneralStan is in trouble, boys and girls, there’s no two ways about that. He’s got the Speaker of the House sniffing haughtily, although that may just be her breathing regularly nowadays, what with the Botox overload and all, and a good many lefties bringing up Truman’s firing of MacArthur, which may only prove that some of these guys still have the crib notes their girl friends Akakyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00187471562516416268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5530948.post-77954024667765798912009-09-28T06:59:00.000-07:002009-10-07T13:37:59.802-07:00RAINOUTS AND GINA DINAPOLI: Well, in the You can teach some old dogs new tricks department, you will be happy to know that the committee that oversees the annual homage to the power of Gina DiNapoli’s breasts, an event whose history you can read more about here, cancelled this year’s parade due to the threat of rain. The threat was very real; every computerized weather map you can think of had Akakyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00187471562516416268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5530948.post-35584736885768225412009-09-18T14:10:00.000-07:002009-09-18T14:12:15.058-07:00SAVING AMERICA FROM THE HEALTH CARE DISASTER: You know, I used to spend a lot of time worrying about the former junior Senator from Illinois’ plans for nationalizing the country’s health care system, but yesterday’s events have more or less taken that burden off my mind. Yesterday, as you may have heard, the United States tossed the Poles and the Czechs under the former junior Senator’s Akakyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00187471562516416268noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5530948.post-20169825187096097302009-09-11T12:36:00.000-07:002009-09-11T16:12:30.425-07:00POST NUMBER 800, IF YOU CAN BELIEVE IT: I don’t, as a rule, watch political speeches; if I must pay attention to such things, I prefer to read them in the paper, where the arguments the bloviating pol is making must stand or fall on their merits without the assistance of all the tricks of the rhetorical trade. But I did see the former junior Senator for Illinois’ speech about health care the Akakyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00187471562516416268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5530948.post-89948492250993159212009-08-19T09:17:00.000-07:002009-08-22T16:53:25.043-07:00JUST A THOUGHT: Nothing long now, sorry, but I was just thinking that Ross Perot was wrong back in 1992 when he said that the giant sucking sound we’d hear in the future was the sound of American jobs heading off to Mexico. Nope, that sound will be, in fact, the sound of Grandmas from the length and breadth of this our Great Republic toddling off to one of the scores of new hospitals in TijuanaAkakyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00187471562516416268noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5530948.post-26416076702144990362009-08-10T08:03:00.000-07:002009-08-10T08:07:18.782-07:00A DISTURBANCE ON THE CHAMBER FLOOR: Well, it was nice while it lasted, boys and girls, no two ways about it, but all good things must come to an end and I fear that our good thing is gone as well. For as long as living memory serves, we, the suffering citizenry of the Vampire State, have endured the rule of the three men in a room. For almost a month, we did not suffer from this particular Akakyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00187471562516416268noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5530948.post-73091792775903947882009-07-30T09:04:00.000-07:002009-08-05T10:57:08.699-07:00TAUTOLOGY RUN RAMPANT: Americans are stupid. I know this because Bill Maher tells me so and if Bill Maher tells me so then it must be true. Why are Americans stupid? I don’t know, but Bill Maher is a wealthy man and reached this happy state by telling Americans how stupid they were and if Americans are willing to pay Bill Maher good money for telling them how stupid they are, then Americans Akakyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00187471562516416268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5530948.post-55617758394426850602009-07-19T13:42:00.001-07:002009-07-19T13:47:32.472-07:00There will be a new post up before the end of the week, folks. My apologies, and yes, I know you're tired of my apologizing for this sort of thing, but it isn't lack of ideas or even sloth this time around; the piece is fighting me every inch of the way. I know I should just drop the thing now and move on to other things; I have a couple of good ideas in line waiting for me to write them up; but Akakyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00187471562516416268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5530948.post-74524131361645208802009-06-27T12:09:00.000-07:002010-03-05T09:25:12.869-08:00GIBBERISH AND ITS USES: Foreign language studies are an unjustly neglected part of American education these days, a fact that I think every American ought to feel a bit embarrassed and then more than a little concerned about. The study of foreign languages, like the study of history, expands the mind and slows the creeping provincialism of time and place that is all too often a defining Akakyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00187471562516416268noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5530948.post-76366121925577825312009-06-14T16:33:00.001-07:002009-06-26T07:29:04.158-07:00Okay, it's halfway through June and noting new here. I suppose I should get on with it and think of something. It's not like there isn't a lot to write about, it's just a matter of working up the mental energy to sit down and get on with it. I wish to report, however, that I am thoroughly sunburned, which looks fairly unattractive on me; other people tan, I merely turn deep red and then start Akakyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00187471562516416268noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5530948.post-86889162519488614242009-05-27T11:08:00.000-07:002009-05-27T11:12:35.321-07:00ARBORICIDE REVISTED: As I write this, the boys from our happy little burg’s highway department, who are as cheerful a bunch of vandals as you’d ever care to meet and never let anyone tell you any different, are very busily and very loudly digging a hole in the sidewalk right outside my office window. I am not sure why they are doing this; I really don’t pay as much attention to local politics asAkakyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00187471562516416268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5530948.post-48677022379144319492009-05-17T15:15:00.000-07:002009-05-17T15:17:00.392-07:00Not that anyone can tell, given the paucity of posts recently, but I am going on vacation for the first time in two years, so the posting here will be even less frequent than it usually is for the next week or so, if such a thing is really possible.Akakyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00187471562516416268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5530948.post-91271080949332754472009-05-06T13:11:00.000-07:002009-05-06T13:14:43.380-07:00MISS CALIFORNIA, OR THE PERILS OF PAULINE, A TOUCHING MELODRAMA WITH LIONS, ELKS, AND THE KNIGHTS OF COLUMBUS: Continuing our theme about meaningless kerfuffles, I should point out at the beginning of this screed, in the interests of full disclosure, that no member of my family has ever entered a beauty pageant. There are many reasons for this, a case of the congenital fuglies being one of the Akakyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00187471562516416268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5530948.post-71044874854519885682009-05-02T10:02:00.000-07:002009-05-02T10:17:20.281-07:0025 THINGS YOU DO NOT KNOW ABOUT ME:This stupid meme is winging its way around the blogosphere again and I, unfortunately, did not step out of the way fast enough to avoid getting hit with it. So here it is, and I will not tag anyone else with this, in the hopes that the meme will die a slow and agonizing death if we all just simply ignore the damn thing.1. I am a figment of Nikolai Gogol's Akakyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00187471562516416268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5530948.post-66944395940263357522009-04-29T08:14:00.000-07:002009-04-29T08:15:57.049-07:00Well, in the not really news department, Senator Specter of Pennsylvania has officially left the Republican Party and joined the Democratic Party, an act somewhat akin to a man marrying his long-time mistress after his long-suffering wife finally divorces him. I hope the change makes the good Senator happy, although I suspect it will negatively impact his newsworthiness. As a Republican In Name Akakyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00187471562516416268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5530948.post-5410608676094639672009-04-21T08:37:00.000-07:002009-04-21T08:39:33.200-07:00RACISM REARS ITS UGLY HEAD: I am a racist. Yes, I am. I know this particularly unsavory fact about myself because Janeane Garofalo says so. Ms. Garofalo comes to us from the morally and psychically elevated plane of Hollywood, whose denizens can spot the lurking shadow of racism in a linen closet full of white sheets. So, I am a racist, as are the tens of thousands of people who either went toAkakyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00187471562516416268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5530948.post-87719876016851840352009-04-15T08:50:00.000-07:002009-04-15T14:11:35.137-07:00GOVERNMENT CARS: I haven’t been keeping up with the news recently; some things are just too depressing for words and I’ve been trying to shift from my usual diet of negativity to something with fewer carbohydrates and more good cholesterol; so I’ve been missing things as they go zipping by, and one of the things that I’ve apparently missed is the United States government guaranteeing the Akakyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00187471562516416268noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5530948.post-18013096886018301042009-04-13T12:52:00.000-07:002009-04-13T12:58:59.128-07:00And then there's/>thisAkakyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00187471562516416268noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5530948.post-52464954541107875762009-04-01T08:41:00.000-07:002009-04-01T08:43:15.442-07:00PUFFING THE KERFUFFLE: You may not have noticed this, but those of us who live here in this our Great Republic are very fond of kerfuffles. Yes sirree, if there’s anything we love more than Mom, apple pie, and Chevrolet, and if you actually remember that commercial you’re a lot older than you’re telling people you are, it’s a good kerfuffle. Why, only last week, so it was, there was a wonderful Akakyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00187471562516416268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5530948.post-36189427149420267752009-03-28T10:41:00.000-07:002009-03-31T10:29:26.309-07:00NOTHING IN PARTICULAR: This is a nice little blog, isn't it? I should spend more time writing stuff for it...well, maybe not. Writing makes my brain hurt.UPDATE: Have something; will be up tomorrow.Akakyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00187471562516416268noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5530948.post-45124086804134972732009-03-19T14:53:00.000-07:002009-03-19T14:54:05.750-07:00 HAPPY SAINT PADDY'S DAY REDUX: Every year, either a little before or after the 17th, the constant reader of The Passing Parade has to put up with yet another screed in which I complain of the growing drunken debauchery of Saint Patrick's Day. Those interested in reading those screeds can go to the archives and read them. But if a picture is worth a thousand words, then the attached will go a Akakyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00187471562516416268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5530948.post-76107682581556910482009-03-13T08:55:00.000-07:002009-03-13T08:56:41.223-07:00DAZE OF HEAVEN...NOT REALLY: And so it’s Friday the thirteenth, a day wherein I usually feel as if I should have stayed home in bed, largely because today is one of those days, like, April 15th, when I know that the cosmic powers that be are out to make my life miserable. Birthdays are sometimes like that as well, but a miserable birthday applies only to the supposed celebrant—the rest of us canAkakyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00187471562516416268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5530948.post-52078319283880652292009-03-09T07:51:00.000-07:002009-03-09T07:55:20.279-07:00I've been here for the past week or so. I'm working on something for here now.Akakyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00187471562516416268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5530948.post-22314123002415950122009-03-03T08:24:00.000-08:002009-03-03T08:24:57.115-08:00And in the meantime, flying skeletons doing the Lindy Hop!Akakyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00187471562516416268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5530948.post-67176385838199803712009-02-20T08:21:00.000-08:002009-02-20T08:22:50.452-08:00AND FOR SNOOP. and for anyone else interested in this sort of thing, this is the pic that's made me $22.80 richer than I was before. Akakyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00187471562516416268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5530948.post-61485528619019099842009-02-20T07:08:00.000-08:002009-02-20T07:21:30.034-08:00ONLY IN DREAMS, IN BEAUTIFUL DREAMS: Hi there. As you have no doubt noticed, especially if you are a constant reader of The Passing Parade, I am going through yet another in a long series of dry spells. I’ve often wondered how the constant readers put up with the less than constant writing here; it must be annoying to have to read the same old stuff over and over again, and I do feel guilty aboutAkakyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00187471562516416268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5530948.post-19044569339481873392009-02-14T09:25:00.000-08:002009-02-15T16:34:33.475-08:00IT'S ORGANIC AND HUMANE...REALLY: I sold a picture this week at a photographic exhibition just down the road from our happy little burg, which made me feel better but did very little for my bottom line. It was a photograph of Pete Seeger and went for $30, of which I got $22.80. It ain’t much, no two ways about it, but it’s more than I had before and I was trying to get rid of the frame anyway. I Akakyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00187471562516416268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5530948.post-78610114038526582602009-02-13T08:47:00.000-08:002009-02-13T08:49:48.354-08:00This guy (I am assuming that it's a guy, not that I would actually look down its underwear and check for myself) is sitting on the roof of my porch, whereas I am standing in my kitchen taking this picture of him/her. In any case, I have something on the griddle now and I will have something new for you folks to read in a couple of days. Until then, there's this bird. Enjoy yourselves. Akakyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00187471562516416268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5530948.post-67669086578582559422009-02-10T09:32:00.000-08:002009-02-10T09:32:52.354-08:00And yes, it's our happy little burg at night!Akakyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00187471562516416268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5530948.post-44882379342949330992009-01-29T08:42:00.000-08:002009-01-29T08:44:08.047-08:00AND NOW THE STAR OF OUR SHOW, NANOOK OF THE NORTH: Nanook of the North starved to death. He didn’t mean to, of course; no one except fakirs and anorexics are actually trying to starve themselves, but things just worked out that way. Nanook enjoyed his fifteen minutes of cinematic fame, but he wearied of waiting for the right part to come along—parts for nomadic hunter gatherers, whether they Akakyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00187471562516416268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5530948.post-70669005687600622972009-01-27T15:02:00.000-08:002009-01-29T12:50:46.485-08:00AND NOW, A WORD FROM OUR PROPRIETOR: First of all, I would like to thank the American pharmaceutical industry for their production runs of various and sundry antiviral medications. Antivirals are a wonderful thing, especially when you are breeding viruses like the damn things are going out of style and you really want them to go out into the great big world and get real jobs, especially jobs thatAkakyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00187471562516416268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5530948.post-89013094803675559002009-01-21T12:29:00.000-08:002009-01-21T12:31:02.945-08:00My apologies for the lack of posting, folks; I have been sick for the past week and it looks like I will be sick into next week as well.Akakyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00187471562516416268noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5530948.post-90915234917188242422009-01-09T07:32:00.000-08:002009-01-18T15:26:07.983-08:00GAZA: I know next to nothing about the Middle East, but since no one else lets ignorance of the region get in the way of having a strong opinion about what goes on there, I think I will share my opinion as well. Vis-à-vis Israel’s current military operations against Hamas in the Gaza Strip, I think that when you are a 97 pound weakling and you make a point of going up to the strongest kid on the Akakyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00187471562516416268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5530948.post-31658013880735851262009-01-08T08:30:00.000-08:002009-01-08T08:31:57.503-08:00SMILE, THOUGH YOUR HEART IS BREAKING: I should smile more. I hadn’t realized that smiling, or the lack thereof, was in any way a problem for me until a few days ago, when a small child came up to my desk and solemnly asked why I didn’t ever smile. My response to the little tatterdemalion, that I smiled all the time, brought forth a huge collective guffaw from my fellow inmates here at the Akakyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00187471562516416268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5530948.post-73234504062532354942009-01-01T09:40:00.000-08:002009-01-01T09:45:31.491-08:00...AND A HAPPY AND PROSPEROUS NEW YEAR TO YOU ALL IN 2009...This is not actually going to happen, of course, not with The One about to bring back the New Deal in all its expensive and regulatory glory, but we can only hope for the best and pray that something pulls the economy out of the doldrums other than the rise of yet another looney dictator who want to rule the world, which is what got us Akakyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00187471562516416268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5530948.post-29605748303839739342008-12-22T06:56:00.000-08:002008-12-22T07:00:51.567-08:00TRADITION: This piece is a sort of tradition here at The Passing Parade; I trot it out every year at this time and I hope you enjoy it as much as I enjoyed not having to think of something new to write.There are twelve days of Christmas, and I’m sure if you’ve somehow managed to forget that fact over the course of the year retailers from one end of this our Great Republic to the other will Akakyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00187471562516416268noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5530948.post-19647159646113265672008-12-18T09:15:00.000-08:002008-12-20T09:53:58.305-08:00UMMM, I MISSPOKE: David Axelrod misspoke. That is what the former junior Senator from Illinois’ transition team says about Mr. Axelrod’s statement that the transition team discussed who the next junior Senator from Illinois would be with the soon to be former Governor of Illinois and they are sticking to that position come hell or new revelations. Five will get you ten, of course, that Mr. Akakyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00187471562516416268noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5530948.post-4429451405966282822008-12-05T07:59:00.000-08:002008-12-05T08:02:17.899-08:00WILDLIFE: Squirrels, I think we can all agree, are cheerful little rodents, despite their somewhat untoward personal habits, such as associating with a moronic moose, eating through power lines during the World Series, and dropping dead in inconvenient places. They do not, it seems, time their collective demises to cause the maximum amount of hullabaloo, unlike, for example, the three toed slothAkakyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00187471562516416268noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5530948.post-75176098423659680632008-11-28T09:13:00.000-08:002008-11-28T09:15:25.279-08:00TRAMP, TRAMP, TRAMP, THE GIRLS ARE MARCHING: While rushing into a Wal-Mart early this morning, a maddened horde of bargain hunting shoppers nearly trampled a Florida woman to death as they swept into the store for the annual Black Friday sales. The victim, a heavy smoker who did not move out of the way quickly enough out of the way of the stampede, will recover from her injuries shortly, Akakyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/00187471562516416268noreply@blogger.com1